While you gain a new identity as a mother, you may feel that you lose parts of your pre-mom self. It is a complex transition that is often encouraged to be unquestionably appreciated. Unfortunately, this makes it difficult for moms to express the parts they miss about their previous selves.
Before becoming a mother, you might have had the capacity to handle multiple roles with ease, such as being a loving wife, a supportive friend, and a caring daughter, all at the same time. However, once you become a mother, the role becomes all-consuming and takes center stage, both in your own perception of yourself and how the world sees you. Motherhood is a life-changing experience that forcefully shapes not only how we view ourselves but also how others perceive us. This can have a significant impact on the choices we make in our lives, as we strive to balance the demands of motherhood with other important roles and responsibilities.
The challenges of motherhood are unique and can vary from person to person. It's normal to feel a sense of grief over the things you may have lost - your sense of ease, your career, your social connections, or the fun activities you used to enjoy. It's important to allow yourself to feel these emotions and to grieve the parts of your pre-mom self that you miss. By acknowledging and addressing these feelings, you can begin to move forward, embrace your new identity as a mother, and find ways to bring your former self into the new. You are not alone, it's okay to feel a range of emotions during this time of transition.
Sometimes it feels like there just aren't enough hours in the day to acknowledge your sense of being. But it's important to remember that we need to make time for ourselves and our interests as well because neglecting them can have negative consequences for yourself and your kids (learn our two hacks for Creating Personal Time as a Mom Here).
It's important that children experience their moms as whole people with their own unique personalities, dreams, and needs. As parents, we spend a lot of time encouraging our children to be aware of their own feelings and confident in themselves, but we don't always remember to focus on our own growth and fulfillment. It's crucial that we lead by example and show our kids that we value our own desires and ambitions, just like we want them to pursue their own passions and goals. By embracing our own identities and practicing healthy self-awareness, we can teach our children to be well-rounded, empathetic, and confident individuals who can handle any challenge that comes their way with strength and grace.
Being a mother is a wonderful journey, but it can also be overwhelming at times. It's essential to remember to take care of yourself too, sacrifices are part of the deal, but that doesn't mean you need to give up your sense of self entirely. You can still be a great mom while also being true to yourself and your other roles in life. Don't worry if things feel a little different than they used to. You're still you, and that's what makes you amazing!